Spekboom Chutney by any other name might just be called dwarf jade relish

Consider the Portulacaria afra, what many call dwarf jade, or port, for short. In South Africa, where the tree is native to, it’s called “spekboom” which literally means “pork bush”. Interesting name…..

We know that it’s a favorite food of elephants (one common name is elephant bush) and rhinos. Goats love it too. What about us? Is it edible? More importantly, is it eatable? How does it taste?

My kids used to call it “apple tree” because to me (yes I tasted it. I’m a curious SOB), it tastes like a Granny Smith apple.

Here is an article I published in 2012 containing everything you ever wanted to know about Portulacaria afra. In it I talk about the habitat, the grazing practices of elephants, how a dwarf jade photosynthesizes and of course, all of the off topic rabbit holes I go down, the intemperate thoughts on life, the universe, and everything. I’m still even a little more upbeat in my writing, as I had not lived through the several long dark tea times of the soul I’ve experienced yet.

Any who (the who is Wil) I’ve been challenging my student (the aforementioned Wil) to come up with a dwarf jade chutney, like they make in the finer eating establishments (and farmhouses spattered around the wilderness) of South Africa.

Finally, he did. First, he had to grow, harvest, and process some leaves.

The recipe:

He had to make some changes to the ingredients as there are some products ubiquitous to South Africa that we just don’t have. Here’s the original recipe:

I mean, what’s up with a ml? And then a cm? You’d have to work at NASA to be able to convert from metric to whatever we call our units of measurements.

And what is “B-Well chilli oil? Is it chili oil or some other crazy thing called chilli oil? And who is getting well by guzzling oil? Oryx dessert salt? Is that salt from the desert but with an extra “s” or is it sweet salt?

Wil is a better chef than I. He knows when the garlic goes into the dish. And how much abuse it can take to survive the fire. Wil is the Man! And not in that negative connotated way, like “Down with the Man!” But like “Yo! Dude, you da’Man!”, though I do think he was a member of the CIA (not that one, but the Culinary institute of America).

Chopping and sorting.